There're times when the mind is full, full of things. Pleasant or not is a relative thought, but mind is full nevertheless. It does not take misery to make us miserable, we alone are sufficient, we're the creators, and being miserable is a mental make up after all. We're actors, and our director, the subconscious controls us like puppets attached to fine strings.
But when the mind is full, it does not long for things. When you are falling, the initial stage is of panic. And as you continue to descend lower and lower, it subsides. You fall with ease like a heavy leaf, you know you won't die. Life does not kill, it is accidents that kill, life ebbs away, slowly. Others, die. There is a certain soothing sound that life gives you as an indicator and as a balm when you are in a fall. When the mind is full, you don't mind listening to it either. It numbs everything else, and you grow disconnected from problems.
People tell me, that every ailment leaves the host before life leaves.
"This too shall pass", is a phrase for those who would want to see it pass. When you are in a fall, you're pretty much given in, don't care if it would end or not. You know you won't die. Falls never kill, it is the crash that does.
Loss after loss after loss. We register a loss and while it is being evaluated, we question, what do we do now? Nevertheless, the answer is, if you can do something, it is fine, and if nothing can be done? It's fine. Burdens increasing manifold, and the masochistic tendencies start to take over to cushion every blow, you smile with every blow as if it has ceased to matter. And then you want to go quiet, in an observant mode, incognito. Your expressions don't betray you any more, provided they're evoked, which I am afraid happens seldom. You're supposed to be sad, you're supposed to panic, and do rash things, like you did when the fall had started, but the numbness incapacitates you. It's good, I know.
I say, the effect of numbness is funny. If you've known pleasures and pain equally, chances are that it would tickle you, and make you euphoric, or content perhaps. If you've known more pains lately, then pain is what you carry in your mind even in numbness. It cannot be helped. As I said, it is just chemicals in the brain doing what they do.
When in a free fall, when machinery stalls, you need to do nothing so that you don't break anything, because when the ailments start to leave the moment before the crash would come, you've got to pull out really hard, because the adrenaline does not last for long, it has to last long enough to reach a better altitude, better than where we were before.
Falls make you strong. The Phoenix is not a myth, but a metaphor.